Skirting the edge

I was going to write this whole big blog about love - being that my mind is on the subject lately - but after like six drafts it still wasn't happening. And I realized it's because I've been approaching it from the wrong angle. 

What bugs the living shit out of me is how love is made to be so complicated. And I think it's because people don't take responsibility for their own emotions - or even know they can.

See, every time I've fallen in love - and it's only been like two or three times - I've consciously decided to do so. To me, it's relatively simple. If I think I have a chance with the girl, if I like her and all that - well, at some point I decide to love them. 

It's more than just "like a lot". Because how many people do you like a lot - even say you love - but you don't consider having a relationship with them? I've got lady friends that I love, but I'd never have a relationship with them. 

Sure, there are a lot of reasons the whole thing can be made complicated, but to me, simplicity is power. And I get really frustrated when people need to add a whole bunch of shit to things, and most especially this. 

It does seem like the prevailing belief is that love "just happens" or you need to really know someone well before you get into a relationship.  

I disagree, vehemently. TRUE: You don't wanna get married too soon, because being with someone for the rest of your life and raising kids and stuff - you do need to have grown pretty close.  But marriage is a stage in a relationship. You do build up to that. 

Creating a relationship starts a whole lot sooner than that. Even maybe before you decide you love them. Especially in this day and age, people date for years before they get engaged, then they hang around being engaged for a while before finally getting married. There's a lot of time added into it. 

When do you decide to start creating the relationship though? When are you "in a relationship"? When do you fall in love?  

To my way of thinking, that happens pretty early on, provided there is genuine liking and attraction on both sides. If there is, why mess around? 

I'd like to say this doesn't have anything to do with my current life. And in a way, it doesn't. But recent events sure have brought it to mind. 

I just wish it didn't have to be so damned complicated, when it's so simple for me. I know, I grew up in a different world, with different rules. Maybe I'm a fool for expecting them to hold true in this one. 

But love makes fools of us all, doesn't it?

Postscript: No, I have not fallen in love again. It's not safe to, yet. But I could, in a flash. If only things were simpler.